Wednesdays Off

When I leave work on a Tuesday afternoon, colleagues will often say ‘Enjoy your Wednesday off’ enviously, as if it’s some indulgent treat I have access to. In their heads, I’ll be spending my day off doing all the pleasurable things they as able-bodied people imagine they would do with a midweek day off. Alternatively, they’ll ask what my plans are for my Wednesday off, expecting, again based on what they dream they would do with a midweek day off, that I’ll have something exciting or fun planned. It’s not just colleagues, other people in my life have a tendency to make these same projections onto my Wednesdays off.

But the visions others often have of my Wednesdays off are quite different to the reality. For me as a chronically ill/disabled person in the workforce, my Wednesdays off are a necessity, not an indulgence or a luxury. They aren’t some shiny plaything, they are about as functional as you can get. I don’t reach Tuesday night/Wednesday morning, think Yay for Wednesdays off and wonder to myself what exciting, fun things I will do with my day of leisure. Instead, I reach Tuesday night/Wednesday morning, think Thank goodness for Wednesdays off and ask myself what I can do with my Wednesday that will help me to (1) recover from the toll Monday and Tuesday have taken on me physically (and sometimes emotionally) and (2) set me up to get through Thursday and Friday physically (and sometimes emotionally).

Some common elements of my Wednesdays off, activities I pursue in service of the above aims may appear exciting/fun/indulgent/luxurious/insert whatever adjective you like here (eg going for a hike, spending time doing yoga). While I do enjoy these things, they are done primarily as acts of essential self-care, a way to recover from the previous two days of work and recharge before the two days of work to come. The scope of such activities is constrained by what I know to be limits. For example, my hikes are limited to local jaunts (within 15 minutes’ drive from home) under two hours hiking time because any longer driving or hiking will send my body over the edge physically rather than helping me to recover and recharge, which then jeopardises my ability to get through Thursday and Friday.

My overriding feeling about Wednesdays off is one of relief.

First, there is the relief I feel upon reaching Tuesday night each week. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off, I think to myself as I snuggle into bed with a book, unable to see how I could possibly manage to get up and work the next day when I feel so fatigued and achey.

Second, there is the relief I feel when I wake up on Wednesday morning each week. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off, I think to myself as I scan my fatigued and sore body and remember that today, I am mercifully not required at work and can be responsive to my body’s needs.

Third, there is the relief I feel on Sundays. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off, I think to myself as I look to the week ahead and feel like I’ll probably manage to get through it. No longer do I feel a sense of impending doom on Sundays as I stare down the barrel of five workdays in a row and contemplate the physical wreckage my body will be in by the time Friday rolls around. These days, I typically feel relatively calm about my week ahead. The idea of getting through two blocks of two workdays with a pause in between feels relatively achievable.

Fourth, there is the relief of feeling like the rhythm of my life is sustainable over time. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off, I think to myself in place of the old 2021 refrain of I can’t keep doing this. I couldn’t keep struggling through five day work week after five day work week. But I can keep getting through four day work week with Wednesday off after four day work week with Wednesday off. Of course, there difficult patches health-wise where even the four day work week with Wednesday off feels challenging but, on the whole, four day work weeks with Wednesdays off feel sustainable.

Finally, there is the relief of feeling like things in my life are relatively balanced. Thank goodness for Wednesdays off, I think to myself when I reach the weekend and have some energy left in the tank for something other than work. in 2021, after working five days straight, I would spend my weekends simply trying to recover ready to do it all again. I had virtually no energy left for things other than work. Now, while work admittedly still gets a fair chunk of my energy each week, there is also some left for other things. Four day work weeks not only feel more balanced but are closer to balanced mathematically: 4:3 is much closer to a 1:1 ratio than 5:2 is.

For me, there has been no looking back from the switch to four day work weeks with Wednesdays off. The amount of relief this work pattern has brought me speaks for itself. I’m now in a place where I have broadly reached acceptance of the function of Wednesdays off in my life as a necessary part of managing my chronic illness/disability. Unfortunately, coming up against the mismatch between other people’s visions of my Wednesdays off and the reality does sometimes undermine the level of acceptance I feel. 

Being confronted by the reality that four day work weeks with Wednesdays off would look different for a non-chronically ill/disabled person (likely much more exciting and fun) draws into stark relief the impact my chronic illness/disability has on my life. At times, depending on my underlying emotional state, this can be quite distressing.

I also don’t find being told to enjoy my day off or asked what I might do with it distressing when this comes from people who I know understand the lived reality of my chronic illness/disability is like. I suppose I just wanted to put it out there and perhaps educate a couple more people in my life about that lived reality, about the fact that my Wednesdays off are not an indulgence or a luxury, they are a necessity.

Love, hope and peace from Emma.